Category: fiction

Personal Reflection: New Leaves & Old Labyrinths

Last fall I went through crisis hotline and advocacy training with The Turning Point Rape Crisis Center of Collin County Texas. This has been and continues to be an incredible organization to work with and I really cannot say enough good things about them.  The Turning Point is focused on the treatment and prevention of bullying, sexual harassment and sexual assault. They do this predominantly with the help of volunteers and a few very dedicated staff members. Together we run a crisis hotline and provide resources such as Individual, Group and, Friends and Family counseling, yoga therapy, crisis, hospital, and legal advocacy for survivors of sexual assault and their friends or family as well as education programs for the community.

If you want to know more about this organization or if you would like to donate time by volunteering, or some other type of support you can check us out here

As impending springtime draws near, the newness in the air condensates.  I find that manifesting in my life as the reallocation of time to address things to have been issues or challenges for a long time.  Such as my new year’s resolution from last year that never happened, without feeling the pressure to get it done on any timeline.  By removing the pressure to finish things by a certain time and instead focusing on doing “a little bit each day” I have found both more progress and more peace with these activities and within myself.

The writing community I have been working to develop with Alicia at the Roanoke Public Library is growing steadily which fills me with delight.  I have started posting daily writing prompts on my personal twitter (@theonlykenna) and on my Facebook account as well as the writing group on Facebook. Our next meeting is on March 12, 2016 at the Roanoke Public Library 2 PM – 4 PM. I hope to see you there!

When I was at RIT I took a course called Women’s Stories Women’s Films, I took many courses as a part of my Gender studies minor that changed the way I thought about life and the world around me but I feel that this class was particularly relevant.  I remember a reading assignment that we had about labyrinths. This reading implied that we all walk a labyrinth of life, and that as time progresses we just walk in the same patterns time and time again.  The corridors of life remaining eerily familiar but the people or situations we encounter in them changing.  The simple way to express this poetic illustration is ‘everything changes but everything stays the same.’unnamedI often find myself coming back to this visual in life and I say, bring on the spring, bring on the change, bring on the challenges, and the goals, and the endeavors. The learning experiences, the smiles and tears, I can’t wait.

Aside from my new year’s resolutions I have started a journal where I write down my favorite moment from each day.  This has been an awesome practice because it keeps me focused on and looking for my favorite moments instead of stuck thinking about the less enjoyable parts of being a biped carbon based life form that calls this pale blue dot home.

Some of my favorite moments from January were:

“Eating chocolate cake and red wine for breakfast in celebration of mine and my best friends birthday while she was in town, at 2 pm”

“Putting on the completed dinosaur costume that my mom and I designed and made, then going to my birthday party and having an absolute blast.”

“Successfully taking a few steps on the slackline while hula hooping around my waist”

“Pizza and puzzle games, game night”

Un-Memory 1.1

I remember when I was about four, going to get my photograph taken.  I remember because I have one of the copies of the photograph that was once hanging in my Grandparents house, sitting on my desk, like it once sat on hers.  My Grandparents took me to this photo place and we had these matching sweaters, Cameron and I.   I had no idea why they had to match but they did, grandma promised that if we were good for the lady with the camera that we would get to go to the park afterwards.  She was always so nice to us, and always wanted to do fun things. I miss having her around to be supportive and kind, and to listen to my woes.

While Grandma was trying to get us to smile she was standing behind the photographer lady who said “should we get Grandma to dance?”

Grandma started dancing the funky chicken behind the photographer and trying to make us laugh, I Remember the way that her orange turtleneck sweater hung around her as she was dancing there.  I don’t know why we weren’t more helpful, She was just trying to surprise my mother with pictures of her children.  Grandma did that pretty regularly, she snuck us off to the photo studio and got our portraits made before that, and at least five more times in my life after this instance with the matching sweaters.

Grandma loved my Mother so much, just like my Mom was the daughter she had always wanted.  She treated me the same, like the daughter she had always wanted. She was there in the crowd at all my graduations, almost more proud of me than my own parents. It seemed like she always knew exactly what I wanted every time I saw her, regardless of if it was a hug, or the most perfect christmas present that I didn’t even know I wanted or needed, but there she was, always with the best gift of all.

She was magical like that, I can only hope to be that good when I have grand-children.  I can only hope to be so perfect of a mother.

I wish I could have gotten to know her better before she passed away.  I wish she was still around in her house, close enough to ours that I could run away there when I was fighting with my parents as a teenager, but not so close that it was still like being at home.   I wish she was still there, standing behind the camera, dancing the funky chicken just to make me laugh.